I am a mother – even only for 9 weeks and 2 days. Despite, all the wrong diagnosis from previous doctor, I found out that my baby lost his heart beat last Saturday night.
It took me the whole Sunday to cry my emotion out. Only God and my baby know how much I cried that day.
Let me quote from Scott Peck (1978; p.133):
“If someone is determined not to risk pain, then such a person must do without many things: having children, getting married, the ecstasy of sex, the hope of ambition, friendship – all that make life alive, meaningful and significant. Move out or grow in any dimension and pain as well as joy will be your reward. A full life will be full of pain. But the only alternative is not to live fully or not to live at all.”
I will move on. Embrace the tomorrows of my life. And keep the yesterdays as a part of me.
“I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
“I wish I could talk to you for awhile”
Miss you but I try not to cry
As time goes by
And it’s true that you’ve reached a better place
Still I’d give the world to see your face
And I’m right here next to you
But it’s like you’re gone too soon
Now the hardest thing to do is say bye bye“
(Bye-bye by Mariah Carey)